SCOTS GONE WOKE: Nessie Puts ‘She/Her’ Pronouns On Loch Ness Sign!!!

In yet another HORRIFIC loss of legendary folklore to WOKENESS, the Loch Ness Monster has succumbed to the radical left agenda after erecting a wooden sign outside her gloomy Highland waters declaring that her PRONOUNS are "she/her!!"

"This is a complete and utter DISASTER!!!!" declared a local alpha Scottish patriot nearby Loch Ness. "Why do we have to label EVERYTHING?! Back in the good auld days, ye didnae have tae do any of this SHITE! You were either a ‘he’ or a ‘she’ and that was that! Now you have all of these LIBERAL SNOWFLAKES wanting their stupid pronouns. Why does Nessie even need pronouns, we all know SHE is just a monster!!"

Thanks to our sources embedded within the deep state, it is believed that the Scottish Government itself conspired to install the sign outside Loch Ness!! The evil COMMUNIST Scottish First Minister John "Swine" Swinney personally ordered the placement of the new PATHETIC sign using taxpayer money! All while he could've used that money to deport Nessie back to where she came from, the ICE AGE

"You do realise that Nessie is just a myth, right?" said the big science shill Dr. Luna Morrison, a so-called "marine biologist" at the SOCIALIST University of Edinburgh in an alleyway we cornered her in. "Serious, leave me alone. Why are you even asking me about Nessie's pronouns? We all decided that she used female pronouns since the 1930s." The blue-pilled Antifa agent REFUSED to answer whether the Loch Ness Monster has ever attended a "Pride" event.

BEFORE THEY TAKE THIS DOWN: it was confirmed that Bill Gates was involved in TRANSITIONING Nessie from male to female with the help of ancient eldritch spells held within his Windows phone.